Wolfs

The Onion's Future News From The Year 2137

While other media outlets bring you news as it happens, only the Onion News Network has the power to bring you the news before it happens. In the year 2137 a catastrophe has reduced the world to a lawless wasteland — food and water are scarce, social institutions have crumbled, and a screaming, tattooed thug has been installed as the president of what remains of the United States.

Murder 101

Part teen drama, part masterclass, and part edge-of-your-seat crime investigation, follow a high school sociology class in rural Tennessee who help revive a decades-old case into a present-day hunt for a killer.

Spider-Man: No Way Home

Peter Parker is unmasked and no longer able to separate his normal life from the high-stakes of being a super-hero. When he asks for help from Doctor Strange the stakes become even more dangerous, forcing him to discover what it truly means to be Spider-Man.

A Fan's Guide to Spider-Man Homecoming

Zendaya and Tom Holland give fans an exclusive behind-the-scenes look at Spider-Man Homecoming.

Spider-Man: Far From Home

Peter Parker and his friends go on a summer trip to Europe. However, they will hardly be able to rest - Peter will have to agree to help Nick Fury uncover the mystery of creatures that cause natural disasters and destruction throughout the continent.

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Following the events of Captain America: Civil War, Peter Parker, with the help of his mentor Tony Stark, tries to balance his life as an ordinary high school student in Queens, New York City, with fighting crime as his superhero alter ego Spider-Man as a new threat, the Vulture, emerges.

Thunderbolts*

After finding themselves ensnared in a death trap, seven disillusioned castoffs must embark on a dangerous mission that will force them to confront the darkest corners of their pasts.

The Old Man

Dan Chase absconded from the CIA decades ago and now lives off the grid. When an assassin arrives and tries to take Chase out, the old operative learns that to ensure his future he now must reconcile his past.

Final Destination Bloodlines

Plagued by a violent recurring nightmare, college student Stefanie heads home to track down the one person who might be able to break the cycle and save her family from the grisly demise that inevitably awaits them all.

Peter's To-Do List

On the eve of his departure to Europe, Peter Parker tells Ned Leeds that he has several things to do before they leave.

The Invisible Dog

Henry really wants a dog. Because of Mom’s allergies, they can’t get one, so Dad brings home an “invisible dog” (an empty cage).

Star Wars: Skeleton Crew

Four ordinary kids search for their home planet after getting lost in the Star Wars galaxy.

Never Change!

In 2008, the graduating class of North Meadows High School had their senior year cut short due to a disastrous tornado. Now in their mid-30s, they're being forced to return home and finish high school once and for all.

Magic Valley

As one warm October day unfolds, the sleepy town of Buhl, Idaho will never be the same. A fish farmer finds his crop destroyed, a couple of kids are playing an unusual game in the sun-dappled fields, and after a wild party a sleepless teenager is harboring an awful secret….

Clown

A fake trailer for a film. A man finds a clown suit he wears for his son birthday party. But afterwards, the suit won't come off.

Cop Car

Two kids find themselves in the centre of a deadly game of cat and mouse after taking a sheriff's cruiser for a joy ride.

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Raoul Duke and his attorney Dr. Gonzo drive a red convertible across the Mojave desert to Las Vegas with a suitcase full of drugs to cover a motorcycle race. As their consumption of drugs increases at an alarming rate, the stoned duo trash their hotel room and fear legal repercussions. Duke begins to drive back to L.A., but after an odd run-in with a cop, he returns to Sin City and continues his wild drug binge.

Crank

Chev Chelios, a hit man wanting to go straight, lets his latest target slip away. Then he awakes the next morning to a phone call that informs him he has been poisoned and has only an hour to live unless he keeps adrenaline coursing through his body while he searches for an antidote.

Monster Man

Two guys and a female hitchhiker are terrorized by a monstrous looking man driving a giant monster truck.

Grave Decisions

In this black comedy set in small-town Bavaria, 11-year-old Sebastian thinks you can never be too young to be a murderer. He's convinced that he killed his mother on the day he was born and is certain he's already been condemned to purgatory. Deciding he might be able to knock off a few years of his sentence by doing good deeds, Sebastian sets out to find a wife for his father Lorenz. When Lorenz and Sebastian's schoolteacher Veronika fall madly in love with each other, it seems the heavens must be smiling. There's just one hitch: Veronika is married.

Dogma

An abortion clinic worker with a special heritage is called upon to save the existence of humanity from being negated by two renegade angels trying to exploit a loophole and reenter Heaven.

Nowhere

In Los Angeles, a colorful assortment of bohemians try to make sense of their intersecting lives. The moody Dark Smith, his bisexual girlfriend, her lesbian lover and their shy gay friend plan on attending the wildest party of the year. But they'll only make it if they can survive the drug trips, suicides, trysts, mutilations and alien abductions that occur as one surreal day unfolds.

Alice's Restaurant

After getting kicked out of college, Arlo decides to visit his friend Alice for Thanksgiving dinner. After dinner is over, Arlo volunteers to take the trash to the dump but finds it closed for the holiday, so he dumps the trash in the bottom of a ravine. This act of littering gets him arrested and sends him on a bizarre journey.

Up!

Adolf Hitler is hiding out in California under the identity of Adolf Schwartz; however, he is soon murdered by a mysterious assailant. This coincides with the arrival of a mysterious woman in a nearby town. Whatever the case might be, nobody seems interested in investigating the crime, but there are many who are interested in her.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure

The eccentric and childish Pee-wee Herman embarks on a big adventure when his beloved bicycle is stolen. Armed with information from a fortune-teller and a relentless obsession with his prized possession, Pee-wee encounters a host of odd characters and bizarre situations as he treks across the country to recover his bike.

The Northerners

A black comedy set in the 1960s in a small Netherlands community, populated by a cast of eccentrics, all of whom hold a range of sexual obsessions and frustrated desires.

Visitor Q

In a dysfunctional family where the mother is a heroin addict and prostitute, beaten by her son, and the father is an ex-TV reporter, sleeping with his daughter and filming his son being beaten up, ‘Q’, a complete stranger enters the bizarre family, changing their lives for the better, finding a balance in their disturbing natures.

Scary Movie

A familiar-looking group of teenagers find themselves being stalked by a more-than-vaguely recognizable masked killer! As the victims begin to pile up and the laughs pile on, none of your favorite scary movies escape the razor-sharp satire of this outrageously funny parody!

Alvin and the Chipmunks

A struggling songwriter named Dave Seville finds success when he comes across a trio of singing chipmunks: mischievous leader Alvin, brainy Simon, and chubby, impressionable Theodore.

F1

Racing legend Sonny Hayes is coaxed out of retirement to lead a struggling Formula 1 team—and mentor a young hotshot driver—while chasing one more chance at glory.

The Gorge

Two highly trained operatives grow close from a distance after being sent to guard opposite sides of a mysterious gorge. When an evil below emerges, they must work together to survive what lies within.

The Family Plan 2

Now that Dan's assassin days are behind him, all he wants for Christmas is quality time with his kids. But when he learns his daughter has her own plans, he books a family trip to London—putting them all in the crosshairs of an unexpected enemy.

Killers of the Flower Moon

When oil is discovered in 1920s Oklahoma under Osage Nation land, the Osage people are murdered one by one—until the FBI steps in to unravel the mystery.

Outcome

Reef Hawk, Hollywood's poster child since age six, is not okay. When he learns about an extortion plot tied to a mysterious video, Reef preemptively sets out on a redemption tour to make amends, confront his demons, and avoid getting canceled.

Luck

Suddenly finding herself in the never-before-seen Land of Luck, the unluckiest person in the world must unite with the magical creatures there to turn her luck around.

The Family Plan

Dan Morgan is many things: a devoted husband, a loving father, a celebrated car salesman. He's also a former assassin. And when his past catches up to his present, he's forced to take his unsuspecting family on a road trip unlike any other.

Eternity

In an afterlife where souls have one week to decide where to spend eternity, Joan is faced with the impossible choice between the man she spent her life with and her first love, who died young and has waited decades for her to arrive.

CODA

As a CODA (Child of Deaf Adults), Ruby is the only hearing person in her deaf family. When the family's fishing business is threatened, Ruby finds herself torn between pursuing her love of music and her fear of abandoning her parents.

Greyhound

A first-time captain leads a convoy of allied ships carrying thousands of soldiers across the treacherous waters of the "Black Pit" to the front lines of WWII. With no air cover protection for 5 days, the captain and his convoy must battle the surrounding enemy Nazi U-boats in order to give the allies a chance to win the war.

Snoopy Presents: For Auld Lang Syne

After finding out her grandmother won't be visiting for Christmas, Lucy decides to cheer herself up by throwing the ultimate New Year's Eve party. Meanwhile, Charlie Brown tries to fulfill one of his resolutions before the clock strikes midnight.

Fountain of Youth

A treasure-hunting mastermind assembles a team for a life-changing adventure. But to outwit and outrun threats at every turn, he'll need someone even smarter than he is: his estranged sister.

Wolfwalkers

In a time of superstition and magic, when wolves are seen as demonic and nature an evil to be tamed, a young apprentice hunter comes to Ireland with her father to wipe out the last pack. But when she saves a wild native girl, their friendship leads her to discover the world of the Wolfwalkers and transform her into the very thing her father is tasked to destroy.

Propeller One-Way Night Coach

During the golden age of aviation, a young airplane enthusiast and his mother embark on a cross-country journey to Hollywood—and their simple flight transforms into the trip of a lifetime.

Argylle

When the plots of reclusive author Elly Conway's fictional espionage novels begin to mirror the covert actions of a real-life spy organization, quiet evenings at home become a thing of the past. Accompanied by her cat Alfie and Aidan, a cat-allergic spy, Elly races across the world to stay one step ahead of the killers as the line between Conway's fictional world and her real one begins to blur.

Ghosted

Salt-of-the-earth Cole falls head over heels for enigmatic Sadie—but then makes the shocking discovery that she's a secret agent. Before they can decide on a second date, Cole and Sadie are swept away on an international adventure to save the world.

Beastie Boys Story

Here's a little story they're about to tell... Mike Diamond and Adam Horovitz share the story of their band and 40 years of friendship in a live documentary experience directed by friend, collaborator, and their former grandfather, Spike Jonze.

Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me

After years in the limelight, Selena Gomez achieves unimaginable stardom. But just as she reaches a new peak, an unexpected turn pulls her into darkness. This uniquely raw and intimate documentary spans her six-year journey into a new light.

Finch

On a post-apocalyptic Earth, a robot, built to protect the life of his dying creator's beloved dog, learns about life, love, friendship, and what it means to be human.

The Lost Bus

A determined father risks everything to rescue a dedicated teacher and her students from a raging wildfire.