Rushing or Dragging

Peter makes good on another power outage at home by retelling "Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back".

The heroic Leonidas, armed with nothing but leather underwear and a cape, leads a ragtag group of thirteen Spartans to defend their homeland against the invading Persians (whose ranks include Ghost Rider, Rocky Balboa, the Transformers, and a hunchbacked Paris Hilton). No one is safe when the Spartans take on the biggest icons in pop culture!

A group of self-absorbed actors set out to make the most expensive war film ever. After ballooning costs force the studio to cancel the movie, the frustrated director refuses to stop shooting, leading his cast into the jungles of Southeast Asia, where they encounter real bad guys.

Affluent and arrogant businessman Goddard Bolt, feuding with rival Vance Crasswell over a land deal, makes a bet with Crasswell that he has the wits and street smarts to live penniless and anonymous on the rough streets of Los Angeles for thirty days. But Bolt has a rude awakening when the reality of homelessness hits him. Still, he finds a silver lining in a burgeoning romance with Molly, a former Broadway dancer who has fallen on hard times.

Robin Hood comes home after fighting in the Crusades to learn that the noble King Richard is in exile and that the despotic King John now rules England, with the help of the Sheriff of Rottingham. Robin Hood assembles a band of fellow patriots to do battle with King John and the Sheriff.

The Muppets gather to watch their newly-finished big-budget rich-and-famous feature film: a talent agent persuades Kermit the Frog to leave the swamp to pursue a career in Hollywood. On his way there, he meets a bear, a pig, a whatever (his future muppet crew), and some special celebrity guest stars, while being chased by the desperate owner of a frog-leg restaurant!

One night Jefferson Reed gets hit in the chest by a souped-up chunk of meteor. So he can fly, but he's scared of heights. He can master the information in any book ... for about thirty seconds. Now his friends and family want him to protect their community from the dreaded Golden Lords.

"This Is Spinal Tap" shines a light on the self-contained universe of a metal band struggling to get back on the charts, including everything from its complicated history of ups and downs, gold albums, name changes and undersold concert dates, along with the full host of requisite groupies, promoters, hangers-on and historians, sessions, release events and those special behind-the-scenes moments that keep it all real.

Crafty railroad worker Bart becomes the first Black sheriff of Rock Ridge, a frontier town about to be destroyed in order to make way for a new railroad. Initially, the citizens of Rock Ridge harbor a racial bias toward their new protector. However, they warm to him after realizing that Bart and his perpetually drunk gunfighter friend Jim are their only defense against a wave of thugs sent to rid the town of its population.

Young Jim Hawkins and his two best friends, Gonzo and Rizzo, embark on a voyage across the high seas in search of buried treasure, but soon find that not everyone onboard can be trusted.

On a bet, a gridiron hero at John Hughes High School sets out to turn a bespectacled plain Jane into a beautiful and popular prom queen in this outrageous send-up of the teen movies of the 1980s and '90s.

Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning begins with Captain James B. Pirk of the starship Kickstart shipwrecked on the 21st century Earth with his crew. Originally from the distant future, Pirk and his crew traveled back in time to save the Earth from hostile aliens, but lost their ship and became stranded. Pirk's daily routine consists mainly of stuffing his face at the local fast food restaurant, and he is finding it difficult to convince the ladies he is, in fact, an intergalactic space hero from the future. As the prospects for humanity's conquest of space look increasingly bleaker, Pirk comes up with a questionable plan to save mankind's future...