A Slave of Vanity

A comedy of wrong assumptions, misunderstandings and martial mix ups because of jumping to conclusions.

In a bustling little coast town a blustering man, who poses as a sea captain, and a trig U.S. Revenue officer, are in love with the same girl.

Besse Belwin works as a stenographer for district attorney John Mobley. It doesn't take long for Mobley to fall in love with his cute little employee and he proposes. Besse doesn't reveal that her father has a criminal past which he has since renounced.

Young bride Patricia Morley's flirtatious ways at a summer resort keep her husband Henry in a state of continual anxiety. At an old-fashioned barn dance, Patricia enacts the role of a chicken breaking out of an egg, and Henry's wrath explodes. After accusing her of being in love with another man, Henry returns to New York and files for divorce. Heartbroken, Patricia sends her friend Victoria French to tell Henry that she is dying.

Happy O'Brien, called "The Microbe," or "Mike" for short, a female street urchin who sells newspapers dressed as a boy to avoid harassment, is saved from arrest for fighting other newsboys in Chinatown by wealthy author DeWitt Spense. DeWitt, there to purchase drugs, is so moved by Mike's pugnacity, that he takes her to his mansion for literary inspiration. When DeWitt learns that Mike is a girl, he resolves to educate her. As Mike blossoms, DeWitt's attentions turn to love, to the dismay of Judith Winthrope, who wants to marry him, and his friend Robert Breton, who, with Judith, convinces Mike that DeWitt's writing is suffering because of her.

An escaped convict stows away on a ship of mutinous treasure hunters to find the crooks who framed him for murder.

After Ned Hamilton is rejected by his girlfriend, he travels to Japan where he hears an old legend about the Willow Tree Princess, who kills herself so that her lover will go off to battle. When he makes a purchase from Tomotada, an image maker, he meets his pretty daughter O-Riu, and they recreate the events of the legend.

When oil magnate Thomas Waring receives a letter from his old friend, Mrs. Juliet Smith, suggesting that his beloved daughter Maida spend her vacation at Mrs. Smith's island home, Waring encourages Maida to accept as he has to go East on business. After Mrs. Smith supposedly gets Maida, Waring receives a call from the real Mrs. Smith, who says that Maida has left with an impostor.

Lilly Meany has grown up amongst charlatans, including her father. She decides to become a faith healer, and her first victim, a rich hypochondriac woman, is easy enough to "cure." In fact, the woman's so happy with Lilly, now calling herself Vashti Dethic, that she recommends her to her nephew, Judah, Lord Asgarby, who has a crippled sister, Eve. The little girl gives Lilly so much innocent trust and love that she actually is able to walk for the first time ever.

After her mother dies, a young girl is sent with her little sister to live with their aunt and uncle, who treat her terribly. The aunt and uncle run a show at the Panama exposition and turn her into a human butterfly.

After his brother's death, Arnold Downs, to save the reputation of his brother's sweetheart, Clara Myers, marries her, though he is in love with Sada Block, his employer's daughter. Five years later finds Arnold in business for himself and Block's competitor. The father of the girl never has been able to forgive the young man for giving up his daughter for Clara, and by bribing Arnold's bookkeeper he takes his revenge in driving Downs to the verge of bankruptcy. Clara's child, who is an adept at picture puzzles, takes some torn papers from the waste basket, matches them and shows them to her mother. Clara sees by them how her husband has been underbid by Block. That night she and her father, disguised as robbers, enter Arnold's office and take the traitorous bookkeeper prisoner. They present the evidence to Arnold who is saved from failure, and husband and wife discover that they have come to love one another.

King Louis XIII of France is thrilled to have born to him a son - an heir to the throne. But when the queen delivers a twin, Cardinal Richelieu sees the second son as a potential for revolution, and has him sent off to Spain to be raised in secret to ensure a peaceful future for France. Alas, keeping the secret means sending Constance, lover of D'Artagnan, off to a convent. D'Artagnan hears of this and rallies the Musketeers in a bid to rescue her. Unfortunately, Richelieu out-smarts the Musketeers and banishes them forever.

A beautiful heiress is an excellent poker player. Her comfortable life changes when her father and his fortune die during market crash of the 1800's.

The tactics of a vicious slumlord and greedy businessman finally drive a distraught man to commit suicide. The businessman is tried for murder and executed, and is afterward taken by demons to the Hell where he will spend the rest of eternity. .

John spies his girlfriend embracing his brother. Stunned, John deposits the family's money and leaves the country. Years later he returns to find his brother dead, the plantation in ruins, and that he is suspected of stealing the money.

In the sordid shirt factory in which she works, Sadie Hicks dreams of the great outdoors. Surrounded by men of puny minds and flabby bodies, her fancy goes out to great manhood that is strong of mind and muscle. Translated in the language of the shirt factory life she knows best, she finds that she admires a man with a 44 chest. She sees a shipment of 44s all ready to be sent to Arizona, and she writes a little note and tucks it into one of the shirts. On account of a rush order, the box is sent to Canada and the shirt with Sadie's note reaches John Stoddard, a wealthy civil engineer, who prefers the life of the woods to the polite society enjoyed by his family and friends.