Rocco Simonelli

When an inner-city Miami schoolteacher gets her knee broken after standing up to the school's gang leader, her mercenary combat specialist boyfriend goes undercover as a substitute teacher to take down the punk. Soon he discovers a conspiracy of criminals at work, and must reassemble his team from his last jungle raid to stop them.

When teacher Randall Thomasson is killed during a carjacking, an unexpected visitor shows up at his funeral - his estranged brother, Karl Thomasson. An ex-Green Beret turned mercenary, Karl signs on as a new substitute teacher in order to investigate Randall's murder.

A struggling writer takes a job for his mobster uncle in order to obtain first-hand material for a book on conspiracy plots and the JFK assassination. They often say that a good writer lives what he writes, but what happens when the life that the writer is living could likely get him killed?

A former mercenary joins a military academy as a teacher. He soon discovers a neo-Nazi group, code-named Werewolves, formed among the cadets. He also quickly finds that they have military leadership among the officers at the Academy.

At a college visit to a war buddy's professor daughter, mercenary Treat Williams finds her brutally beaten. He then poses as a teacher to teach a lesson to the football jocks responsible.

Tells the story of Mr. Softee, a mutant hybrid with an ice cream cone for a head, who was the victim of the anti-miscarriage drug "Nodroppinum" which changed the pregnant mother's child into whatever food she craved at the time (a parody of the Thyladimide scandal from the 60s.) Softee was the head of an ice cream company, until he was forced out of business by the artificial ice cream mafia, led by Don Tofutti.

Sensitive but unsuccessful New York magazine columnist Michael (James Lorinz King of New York, Frankenhooker) looks on with hopeless envy as his self-confident, shallow brother Frankie catches all the women, makes all the money and never feels a pang of remorse at his amoral behavior. Enter Lila (Barbara Sicuranza), a tough, sexy bartender. Initially Frankie's got her, and Michael gets fixed up with her biker chick roommate (Joan Jett, of Joan Jett and the Blackhearts). Then, through a twist of fate, Michael finds himself vying with Frankie for Lila's affections, and the results are both riotously funny and touching. Filmmakers Roy Frumkes and Rocco Simonelli (writers of the cult hit The Substitute) have created a romantic comedy... for people who hate romantic comedies!